Grand Palladium Bavaro Resort & Spa

This could be the hotel for you, but only if you like decrepit rooms, poor service, surly staff, unhygienic conditions, leaky pools and entertainment that starts at midnight.
We traveled to this hotel, after reading the reviews here and having holidayed in the Dominican Republic a few times before. We have never previously found anything but happy staff, intent on making our time on holiday good in staying in other similar sized hotels. The only time we had had stomach upsets was in Egypt a few years before.
On arrival we spent 40 minutes of form filling until the clerk was happy with the details. We were then told that we had been moved to a sister hotel, the Palladium Palace, no reason, apology, travel rep, nothing.
The room was about the same size as my garage. Obviously built many years previously and not updated since. Although clean everything was in poor repair. The brochure claimed that they were "newly refurbished", that's a lie.
There was a bath in the middle of one end of the room, took up massive amounts of room for such a small bath. There were dozens of cigarette burns on and in it, but I still tried sitting in it. If you are more than 4 foot 6 inches tall don't bother. It's too small, I'm over 6 feet tall and my knees came out above the top of the bath.
The shower is in its own little room. Using it is an experience, the shower door is almost big enough to fit the doorway, so every time it was used it flooded the bedroom. It is so small that I could not wash my legs without touching three walls. Drying off had to be done in the bedroom as there was just no room to do so in the shower room.
The noise from the aircon was similar to the engines of aircraft we flew over in on takeoff. We had to run the thing at maximum for hours while we went for dinner then turn it off so that we could sleep. Overnight the temperature would rise enough to wake us. This was not normally a problem as getting a nights sleep was not possible with the mattresses that were on the beds. I like a firm bed but rock solid is too much.
The minibar was topped up daily but perpetually leaked water from the pool in the bottom of the fridge.
If anyone in the party is diabetic, please go somewhere else. There is no conception of sugar free drinks (diet Pepsi being the exception). Everything had massive amounts of sugar in it.
The pools were large and also showed that they were very old. All of the sun loungers had no spring in them, some sagged so much that they were unusable. The main pool and the children's pool lost 8 - 12 inches of water a day, topped up for a few hours every morning from the fire hoses. The problem was that the chlorine testing and treatment was done before the additions. The pool tiles had large cracks and big patches of tile missing.
The second pool did not have any obvious leaks, but the returns from the filters showed signs of pump cavitation, draw your own conclusions from that.
The beach looks enormous, but the full length is shared with other hotel complexes so is deceiving. It gets very busy very quickly.
Only one pool had any pool side entertainment and then only after 3 O'Clock in the afternoon. To be included I was told, by the very angry holiday rep, I had to go and ask them if I could join in! There was a daily dance / exercise thing on the beach at about 11 in the morning. The evening entertainment started at 23:30, yes start just before midnight, so don't have a room near unless you are a night owl.
All music, was played at a volume a couple of notches past distortion. To order a drink shout or mime, nothing else would do. When staff were asked to turn down the volume it would be, but only until all three of the songs that they had were played and the volume back up again.
For every member of staff serving there were 4 trying to push trips, diving, snorkeling etc. There is obviously commission based pay system that is driving these people. I was even refused pool towels on the first day until I had looked at the "Hotelextras" presentation that the towel guy had spread out.
In every other hotel I have been in in the Dominical Republic cleanliness was obviously a part of the hotel culture. All toilets manned at all times insisting on alcohol rub being used by everyone as they left. Nobody was let into the dining rooms until they had used rubs. Here the public toilets were unmanned, no hand gel dispensers anywhere. Most of the time they were flooded in the Gents (yes, thats what they were flooded with) and the Ladies had a problem with blocking too, so the wife says. There was someone near the door of the dining rooms, but they had other jobs too and there was never an insistance on using alcohol rubs, with most people not bothering. Even when it was used there was never enough to to cover both hands.
Find out where the public toilets are. They are few and far between and you will have a time when you will need them in an emergency.
We had stomach problems, me twice, during the stay. Stomach cramps, diarrhoea, high temperature for 4 days, a couple of days respite and the same again. On speaking to other guests this looks like being the norm here.
All staff were grumpy, never greeted first by any staff whilst walking and only about half answered when I did say "Hola".
As long as you like food that is very highly flavoured with a strange mix of spices then you will be happy, otherwise you have a problem. Even the roast potatoes had 4 different spices on them.
Check the departure time, ours was delayed by an hour, nobody told us, we just had to wait, worrying that there was a problem and that we would miss the flight. The rep, when challenged, "could not find us", even though he had passed me the "THE FOLDER" to check the departure time that morning.
Find our where "The Folder" is hidden. The big display boards are only for non UK companies, ours use a folder that is most times in use by other reps, as it contains dozens of pages of trips and only two of information.
If you have a problem you could ask "Vinney" the rep, if you can find him, but you will only get an aggressive response that puts the problem back at your own door. You could try the reception for help, but only if you are fluent in Spanish, no English spoken. If you want a response wave dollar bills, its the only way.